I’m always an Oscar lover, but I’m especially pumped for it this year.
So I am currently home sick right now, and what do I do when I’m sick? Why of course! I watch television! So I’m going through the channels looking for something to watch, and I come across the Disney channel. I haven’t watched this channel since like 8th grade, so I was mildly curious of what was there. I watched about 15 minutes of this show called ANT Farm, and holy shit was it terrible. I don’t mean like “this is childish and stupid”, but it was just awful. It had no content, no depth, no characters, nothing. It was just a bunch of teenagers complaining and saying terrible jokes. And I mean TERRIBLE jokes. I figured that not every show on Disney Channel now could be like this, so I turned to my good friends Youtube and Wikipedia to find more info. And all be damned, I found that pretty much every show on there is like this.
First I must say that Phineas and Ferb gets a pass. Phineas and Ferb was I think the last new show that came on while I watched Disney Channel, and even now it’s pretty witty. Nice work on them. Everyone else though, we have some issues. Here’s the thing about Disney channel: I think every kid between the ages of like 2 and 12 watches it. No one likes to admit they do, but they do. Because of that, every single child is forming the same sense of humor, and is kind of looking to these shows to see how they should act. Now that is kinda effed up in its own right, but that’s another conversation. What concerns me is that the people who watch this channel, which like I said is pretty much everyone under 13, is gonna be a stuck up brat who complains all the time and makes terrible jokes. I know what you’re thinking, this is what every middle schooler is, but let’s not make it stick.
I remember the days when Disney Channel played actual television shows of quality. Sure, they were kids shows. Sure, they were kind of stupid. They had substance though. As stupid as Lizzie McGuire could be, they dealt with actual issues that actual kids faced. And they didn’t cast these prissy models with no comedic timing either. They cast kids who slightly could act and looked like someone I would see every day. Sure Suite Life of Zack and Cody was about spoiled kids who lived in a hotel (I cannot relate at all), but they at least dealt with issues of having a twin or having separated parents. Sure, That’s So Raven often had terrible jokes and was unrealistic as hell, but everyone on there knew how to act and the show dealt with real issues, including race. It’s pretty ballsy to deal with race on a kid’s show if you ask me. Even Hannah Montana, which I find to be pretty terrible, had redeeming factors.
I really have to be thankful that there was some quality programming there, because as much as we hate to admit it, the way we all act is somehow correlated to what we see on the magic box. Most people I knew grew up with Disney Channel, and most of those people are thankful for it. We actually took something away from it. Now, like I said, it’s just models complaining and making terrible jokes. So with that said, if you still watch this shit for some odd reason: don’t. Seriously, stop it. I know that an older person reading this would be insulted by the fact that I even suggest you watch this, but considering I had a successful advertising campaign on a middle schooler’s profile picture, I have no idea who’s reading this. If you want to watch something childish yet entertaining: watch the old stuff. It’s not even that old. Go back to like, 2009. You’ll be an actual human because of it. If you are old enough to kind of be over Disney channel though, then watch HBO. Really awesome channel. Also Homeland is amazing.
E-rock, who like Corey, is in da house.
Congratulations to amacam for winning regal eagle and celebrating with all the way hashbrowns at WaHo. And just so I’m clear, I’m also absolutely disgusted by that food. #gross #congrats
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